Julie Chen talked to Kathleen Bogle, an Asst. Prof. of Sociology at LaSalle University about the vague meaning of term "hookup" for young people who may or may not be having sex. Bogle says the meaning does not always mean sex and can be less harmful than people think. That said it is upsetting to hear dating being replaced by more random and casual encounters. Kathleen Bogle says some of these casual daters return to more typical dating later in life. See also, Charles Blow's op-ed for the New York Times on the "Demise of Dating."
The Seattle Times recently talked to speed dating expert Aviva Fannie. She has held many speed dating events in Seattle and so she knows the common trends and the mistakes people make. One of the mistakes she sees often is guys not looking at the girl - they look at her drink instead. She also said there is always one attractive girl at speed dating events and all the guys will pick her but an attractive guy won't be chosen by all the girls.
How the sexes differ: "There is always one really attractive woman, and all of the guys will choose her." But for a really attractive guy, "Maybe 50 or 70 percent of the women will choose him. Women also look at his personality and interpersonal skills. Women are more selective than guys. That's just the nature."
The knowledge that women won't all choose the most handsome male attender might encourage more guys to try speed dating. Aviva also has some good advice for speed daters: "People like to hear their name, so mention their name in the conversation. A good sense of humor helps. It puts people at ease.... Show you have a brain. And guys, grooming helps."
Men Try Romantic Fixes to Solve Relationship Troubles
The Herald Sunreports on a study that found unsurprisingly that men get more romantic when they believe a relationship is in trouble. When there are relationship troubles the study found men trying romantic fixes while women were more likely to want to try and discuss the issue.
Couples most commonly tried to improve their relationships by spending time together -- but this was true for 33 per cent of women and only 23 per cent of men.
And when asked what the best thing about their relationship was, women were more likely than men to list friendship, love and support.
Men were more likely than women to list compatibility, the length of the relationship and doing things together.
Women are more open to discussing relationship problems with outsiders -- 70 per cent of women do so, compared with 60 per cent of men.
The study - called the Relationships Indicators Survey - also looked at what causes problems in relationships. The biggest problems were issues of careers and trying to balance work and family. Financial troubles probably ranked high but the article didn't list the percentages for financial woes.
On that account, Alexandre contends President Bush falls short. "To qualify as a gentleman a man most respect God, the earth and women," she says.
"In the case of George Bush, we all know he came from money but love and respect for our Earth did not get handed down. He is therefore missing the primary characteristic of a gentleman," the author says.
Alexandre cites former Teddy Roosevelt as every rich mother's perfect son-in-law. "He pioneered the National Park system, and yet his greatest passion was his family.
"This was a man who cherished the earth and all that was in it and who recognized the need to protect our resources early on," Alexandre says.
The author was Speaker Coordinator for the Environmental Action Coalition, the group that organized Earth Day 1970. It is therefore no surprise that she believes all decent men should possess a natural and God-given passion to save our earth. If they don't have the passion, drop them, she advises readers.
Alexandre also advises women to "Find out where a man's passion lies. Then ask yourself if it's a fit for you." You can read more about Alexandre's advice and her book on Amazon.com and on the book's website.
An Associated Press article says searching Google for information about your date is an increasingly common and practical thing to do.
Dating used to be largely a matter of spending time with a love interest, discovering the good, the bad and the ugly in person. If you were lucky, friends helped fill in some of the blanks.
These days, the Internet -- and the ability to check people out before they ever meet up -- has forever changed the rules.
For better or worse, "googling" your date has become standard practice.
"I often tell my friends that are still in the dating sphere to use the power of Google to their advantage," says Katie Laird, a 24-year-old Web marketing professional and self-proclaimed "social software geek" from Houston.
It's easy to do you just plunk your date's name into Google. However, sometimes you might find out something weird about your date. The article says people have found out their dates are into bizarre fetishes like vampires. A web search may also reveal photos or someone's real age. The worst results may be "mistaken identity" situations when a person finds information they think is about their date but it is really about another person with the same name.
Feng Shui is an ancient Chinese art of object placement that is said help create harmony and boost a person's luck, energy and fortune. Author Linda Binns thinks Feng Shui can also be useful in relationships. She has a new book out called Feng Shui for Relationships. Here are a few of her tips.
To symbolize a close relationship, it is important to position decorative items in pairs. For instance, display a painting of a couple, place two ornaments together, or hang two pictures that form a set. Two flowers in a vase or two stuffed animals beside one another are other examples of pairs that you can place in your environment.
If you already have a partner whom you wish to become closer to, it is important to display photos that feature you as a couple. Pictures of you with your partner and other individuals, whether family or friends, symbolize your propensity to give up time as a couple in order to become part of a larger group.
Clutter and other distractions in the bedroom, such as exercise equipment, a television, work-related items or a computer, serves to bring unwanted distractions into your relationship. Your bedroom should be a sanctuary that feels romantic and invites you to spend time with your loved one.
Make sure that the side of your bed is not against a wall because this position symbolizes only one way in and out of the bed and indicates that there is room for only one person.
When you make your bed, keep it relatively uncluttered and create a space that will easily accommodate a couple.
Master bedrooms ideally feature warm, soothing colors, such as cream, taupe, cocoa, or shades with a red or pink base. Such warm bedroom colors represent warm, close relationships.
When you remove clutter, don't move anything to a storage box under your bed. People store all kinds of things under the bed - fire extinguishers, ladders, guns, papers, books, exercise equipment and more. Remember that, based on the principles of Feng Shui, energy should freely flow throughout a space, including under the bed.
Large bedrooms should feature cozy, intimate nooks, such as sitting areas. Again, creating an intimate space reflects an intimate relationship.
Don't forget to "set your intentions" and focus your new energy on what you want before you started moving all your furniture around. Linda Binns says, "Perhaps you want to strengthen or rekindle the flame of an existing relationship. Perhaps you want to attract an exciting new romantic partner to your life. Perhaps you want to find a life partner with which to share the future. While there can be a variety of issues or scenarios, it is important to begin by considering your current situation and recognizing what you would like to change." You can read more Feng Shui advice from Linda Binns on her website Harmony Inside and Out.
Kristen Alexandre, the author of 
